Comedy Show Audience Member Calls 911 Because He Was Offended By A Joke. FOR REAL.

This is our world now, y’all.

We’ve now reached a point in the Land Of Perpetual Outrage that a dude who attended a comedy show in Florida felt a need to call 911 after hearing a joke that didn’t sit well with him.

The comedian is an Egyptian dude by the name of Ahmed Ahmed, and he was performing at Off The Hook in Naples. Ahmed made a joke about the Middle Eastern audience members forming a terrorist cell.

I didn’t hear the joke personally.  If I had, I likely wouldn’t have found it all that funny, but who knows – context matters and perhaps I might’ve.

Regardless, I would have seen it for what it was.  A FREAKING JOKE, at a comedy show, which I had voluntarily attended.

By the way, the dude who was offended?  He waited until the NEXT DAY to call 911.  You know, after he’d time to let the full weight of the triggering settle in.

Adam Carrolla has audio of the 911 call, as well as an interview with Ahmed Ahmed:

If you can’t listen to the audio, the 911 caller told the dispatcher the following:

‘The first thing he said when he got out on the stage was, “OK, how many Middle Eastern people do we have here? And a whole bunch of people raised their hand. I guess they went to see him because he was Middle Eastern. Ya know, when you hear the name Ahmed Ahmed.. and there weren’t a lot of people there, I guess because of the name. I went because I got free tickets. As the people raised their hands, they said where they’re from and they said, “I’m from Iraq,” “I’m from Iran,” “I’m from Pakistan,” I’m from here, I’m from there. He [Ahmed] said,”That’s great, we could organize our own little terrorist organization.” And I don’t think that was right. I mean, that really bothered me.’

This idiot ACTUALLY THOUGHT calling emergency services because he was offended at a comedy club joke was the normal, proper, right thing to do.

And because of this, officers Actually Went to the comedy club, and Ahmed, the club owner, and the two police officers all had a nice chuckle over how completely stupid the caller was (my words, not theirs.)  In the end, the police officers told Ahmed not to change anything about his comedy routine, because IT’S FREAKING COMEDY (my words, not theirs.)

According to the sourcelink, Ahmed “couldn’t quite put his finger on what might have prompted the 911 call.”  He said, “I don’t know if it’s fear, or racism, or ignorance, or Islamophobia or whatever you want to call it, it’s unfortunate that someone was very adamant about making a point to make a 911 call.”

I don’t think it’s any of those things, actually.  I think it’s that we are surrounded by humorless morons who don’t understand the purpose of comedy, who are constantly looking for things to be upset over, and who think when they ARE upset, everyone has to know about it and someone must be held to account.  We’re living in a culture of victimhood-hunters.

I don’t know how to fix this, you guys, but something’s gotta give soon.  This is just bananas.