Chelsea Handler Says She’s ‘Sexually Attracted’ To Robert Mueller In A Bizarre Response Following His Investigation

Mueller’s report is finished, and while we are still waiting on the nitty gritty details, we know that there will be no additional charges filed. In other words, President Trump is in the clear, as we predicted before this entire witch hunt began.

I’ve been checking the Twitter feeds of prominent celebrities who loathe Trump. They’ve been banking on this report. They were sure that this would end their nightmare, but they were wrong. One of the first people I checked on? Chelsea Handler. As everyone knows, she suffers from severe TDS and has referenced the Mueller report a number of times.

I was dying to see her reaction. Then I looked and regretted my decision, because ew.

She probably wanted to pass out when she found out there would be no additional charges, so she tried to handle it with a “joke” (I use the term loosely). I think she wants everyone to think that she’s v. chill over these developments, but she’s probably dying inside. Better hit up another mindfulness conference, chicky.