Jussie Smollett Managed To Keep Ahold Of His Sandwich Throughout HATE CRIME Attack

Ashley (Kimber)

Um… so, this is an interesting new development:

So this guy managed to hold on to his PHONE and a SUBWAY SANDWICH as two hateful white supremacists tied a noose around his neck, broke his rib, and poured bleach all over him?

Got it.

He must have been REALLY hungry for that sandwich, huh? I wonder if there was bleach on the sandwich. It probably wouldn’t hurt, because Subway sandwiches already taste like cleaning supplies on cardboard. (No offense. Don’t get TOO worked up, Subway fans.)

Riiiiiight.

CAN WE GO AHEAD AND CALL THIS WHAT IT IS NOW?!