Woke Knitting Company Selling Prosthetic Penises For Kids

OPINION | This article contains political commentary which reflects the author's opinion.

I know I’m not the only one who’s been worried about how all the leftists who majored in Lesbian Dance Theory were going to find jobs when they left college. Have no fear! There’s a new career field that’s right up their alley.

You can now knit miniature genitals for a living. I haven’t seen any knitted lady boxes, but since they believe in male and female penises, everyone is covered. Yay, this is 2021!

These are not mini penises for bachelorette party favors as one might expect. No this is a “my toddler needs a prosthetic in its training pants to feel whole” kind of thing. Right. Of course.

Stitchbug Studios assures us on their website that their products are not made for very young children. But that same website also sends a “thank you to the parents out there who support your trans youngsters,” and they show the product being used in a doll’s underwear. So either I’m confused or they’re confused. And I’m 100% sure it’s not me.

I feel like there’s a word for people who are obsessed with teaching kids to view themselves sexually before they hit puberty…It must be slipping my brain. You know, those people who psychologically or behaviorally condition kids into certain behaviors? It will come to me. In the meantime, please enjoy one of my favorite YouTubers being annoyed by the same topic, and the many ways it’s hurting children in today’s society.

And, oh yeah. It’s called grooming. Child abuse. Predatory behavior. It’s weird and it’s gross. Can we please stop making it normal?? I know, there’s no line to differentiate between what’s normal and what’s insane these days. But I would think we could all agree that giving fake penises to kids who don’t even know what penises are might fall outside the realm of “okay”. Silly me, I guess.