I GOT A LAP DANCE FROM ROBBIE WILLIAMS AND NEED TO TELL YOU THE WHOLE STORY.

Mockarena, Co-Founder

How long have I been telling you guys how much I love Robbie Williams?  FOREVER.  I’ve been telling people I love Robbie Williams since the late 90s, which is when I discovered him.  And ever since then, I’ve been subjecting my friends to him and trying desperately to get people here in the states to love him as much as I do.  For whatever reason, he’s never really caught on here, but in the rest of the world?  He’s HUUUUUUUGE.  Don’t believe me?  Google him.  Check out his record-selling stats.

I love him so much that Mr. Mock and I traveled to Germany and Scotland to see him in concert. That was back in 2013 and 2014, when I had no hope of seeing him on home turf, because I’m basically one of his only American fans.  OR SO I THOUGHT.

So as you know from this post, I nearly died of excitement when I heard he was getting a short term residency in Vegas, which is one of my favorite cities, at the Wynn, which is one of my favorite hotels, in 2019, which is the 50th anniversary year of my birth. 🙂  Mr. Mock and I got 4th row seats to his show in March, and then Mr. Mock scored us VIP photo op packages to MEET Robbie Williams at his show in June.  You can read that spaz-out announcement post right here. 

So two weeks ago, I got to meet him, as you may have read right here. At each of those shows that we saw, there’s a point where Robbie brings a lucky girl up on stage with him and they get serenaded.  I watched it happen in March and June, and was FILLED WITH ENVY of those two girls who got to get up close and personal with him.  And, since an acquaintance of mine had been to two DIFFERENT shows, she confirmed my belief that it was basically a known fact that whoever is seated in B1 – the left end seat of the center section of the front row, was the lucky girl who made it to the stage. I’d seen it happen twice before, and my friend had also seen it twice before at different shows.  And since I didn’t have that seat, I knew this would be the third show that I’d watch some lucky unsuspecting girl get pulled to the stage for a dream come true moment.

When I was getting dressed for the show, I looked in the mirror right before leaving, and decided I didn’t like the top I had on, so I changed into a super patriotic t-shirt, thinking to myself that because Robbie knows and jokes about the fact that he has very few American fans, perhaps he’d notice me in my shirt.  And as my friend Marcus and I sat in our left-section front row seats, I told him that I was thinking of asking the woman in seat B1 how she GOT her seat, because the only way I could ever top meeting Robbie Williams in person for 45 seconds would be getting pulled up on stage and being serenaded by him.  I said this knowing full well that the likelihood of me being chosen to be pulled up on stage was basically nil.

The two girls sitting next to us, on our right, were from Germany and Mexico, and they were DARLING.  The German girl right next to Marcus had been to two previous shows – in fact, she’d been there just the night before, and she heard our conversation about the B1 seat.  And she told me that the two nights she’d seen the show, he chose people from other seats, INCLUDING THE VERY SECTION WE WERE IN.  But there was no way I was about to get my hopes up, because I’d already had such an amazing 50th birthday month and year – and I couldn’t see how I could possibly be so lucky.

And then, near the beginning of the show when Robbie asked the audience where we were from, he said, “Who here is from America?”  and I screamed my bloody head off WILLING him to notice me.  He pointed at me, and told the crowd, “Look!  There’s my one American fan!”  And there was eye contact and I made googly eyes at him and basically melted.

But again, I figured that was it. That was as good as it was gonna get.  I asked Marcus if he would get a photo of me with Robbie in the background when he worked our side of the stage (he’s great at working the whole stage!) because an actual selfie doesn’t work with the stage lighting.  And so when Robbie made his way a few songs later to our section, I quickly got close to the stage, turned to Marcus in the audience so he could get the pic, and then felt a tap on my shoulder.  And it was Robbie – crouching down to make sure to get in the photo.  I nearly died.  You’ll see that sequence of photos right at the beginning of the video below.

But again, I figured that was it.  That was as good as it was gonna get. I knew that shortly he’d be singing his rendition of Radiohead’s “Creep” – and that that was the first song he’d sing to whichever lucky girl would win his attention, and you guys, HE CAME OVER TO ME.  Thankfully, Marcus was ON IT with capturing video.  During that song, as he’s done in his previous shows, he teases you about work you’ve had done to your face, and he pokes fun at you, and he implied that my forehead looked botoxed (it isn’t.)  But I expected all of that, and it was hilarious, and I ate it all up with a spoon because I knew, in that moment, that I was going up on stage with him a few songs later, and I was deeply regretting my garlic bread choice from our dinner beforehand, and also deeply regretting how completely drenched in sweat I was from dancing my assular area off.

But none of that mattered once the moment came.  I didn’t care about my garlic breath, I didn’t care about my flat and matted and sweaty hair, I didn’t care about anything but the fact that basically one of my most impossible pie-in-the-sky dreams was coming true. And you guys – IT. WAS. EVERYTHING.

BEHOLD:

Obviously, I have watched that video approximately 9700 times, and I can feel my face practically breaking open every time because I smile so hard when I see it.  I’m still absolutely floating from the whole experience.  I just wish Mr. Mock had been there to see it.  I texted him the instant I got off the stage, but he was already asleep (it was midnight Indy time).  So I didn’t get to give him the full download till the next morning.  I didn’t sleep a wink that night!

If you’re wondering what Robbie and I talked about during our dance (OMG I CANNOT EVEN BELIEVE I JUST TYPED THOSE WORDS), he asked me which shows I’d seen, and which were my favorites.  I told him how much I adored the Vegas shows, and he asked if I’d be back to see him next year.  And there’s a moment you’ll see me saying “OMG!” and throwing my hands up, because I had no idea he WOULD be back next year, and then he says, “SHUT UP!” and continues the song.  I loved it.  It was awesome to feel like I was getting inside scoop before he made the announcement official at the end of the show.

After the show was over, the craziest thing was how many people came up to me to congratulate me and get selfies with me – as if I were some sort of huge celebrity simply because I’d been on stage with Robbie.  One gay guy even asked if could touch me, since I had been touched by Robbie and there was only one degree of separation.  It was INSANITY.

The other crazy thing is that it turned out a women sitting behind me in the 2nd row was from Indy as well, and she’d been to like 47 of his shows – obviously traveling the world to do so – and so I know I’m not the only obsessive fan of his out there!  There may not be many of us USA Robbie fans, but we REALLY REALLY REALLY love him.  We are die-hards!

Anyway, it was an unforgettable night, and and an unforgettable way to conclude my 50th birthday festivities.  Mr. Mock asked me what was next – since there’s really no topping that kind of Robbie Williams show experience.  I feel like that was the pinnacle.  But I love the show so much and would see it a hundred more times.  So I’ll probably just try for close-to-the-front-row seats and just enjoy the performance, cheering on the next lucky girls who get a Robbie Williams lap dance. 🙂

Bucket list complete.  50th birthday memories unparalleled.  Whenever you have a birthday next, make sure to celebrate it HARD.  Drag it out for days and weeks.  Savor the fuss.  Dream big.  And you might just see those dreams come true!

Gotta go watch my video 3700 more times now.  🙂

 

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