Beyoncé Drops A New Album Tonight, But Feminists Don’t Want To Buy It Because Capitalism

Hannah Bleau

Word has it that Michelle Obama’s role model, Beyoncé, is dropping her new album, “Lemonade” tonight. Bey superfans are already losing their minds over it, because it tells such a beautiful feminist story. The entire album follows the storyline of a woman finding out her husband cheated on her. She gets mad and is all “Who the f*** do you think I is? You ain’t married to no average b**** boy.” So she declares her independence and parties with her girls and sings “middle fingers up put them hands high, wave it in his face tell him, boy bye!” Because she is FIERCE like that. But then she starts getting lonely and the grind gets old so she decides that she needs to talk to her cheating dog husband. Because “if I wasn’t me, would you still feel me? Like on my worst day? Or am I not thirsty enough?” And then she realizes that she hurt her man by leaving him for cheating on her. His “heart is broken” because she “walked away.” And then she sings about black oppression, because why the heck not? And then she decides that she’s going to work things out with her husband “all night long” even though “so many people” are “just tryna’ touch ya [him].”

I don’t know about you, but I feel insanely empowered right now.

Feminists everywhere LOVE the content and message. Don’t ask me why. I kind of think the whole theme seems a little “anti-feminist.” Your man cheats on you and you go crawling back and work it out with him “all night long?” Not seeing the empowering message there. But still. Feminists love it. Well, most of them. Some have a problem.

Sure, Beyoncé worked hard on this album, but why is she requiring her fellow feminists to purchase it with their own money? That’s disgusting. And the fact that she’s requiring them to sign up for Tidal? She’s contributing to the capitalist patriarchy. Doesn’t she realize that?

Oddly enough, some feminists don’t see this as a problem. They actually believe she’s fighting AGAINST the capitalist patriarchy.

I’m so confused. Is this album empowering? And even if you DO think that it has a powerful feminist message (I’m not seeing it), does forcing people to buy it cancel the message out, because capitalist patriarchy?

Is it feminist or not? Can you be a feminist who hates capitalism but uses it anyway? Or is that hypocritical? Or are the two completely compatible? Is Bey a total hypocrite?

Someone. Help me understand feminism.