DIRTY MIND ALERT: I Never Thought I’d See Anyone So ‘Excited’ About A Hurricane

Ok guys… So if you read COTR often, you know we can often be 12-year-old boys. (Mock’s the worst. Just ask her!)

So while I KNOW hurricanes are a big deal… I had to share this with you. Because I’m cracking up, and I can’t see it alone.

BREAKING: TV meteorologists are predicting this storm to cut a wide swath, dowsing everything in its path, and creating an extremely stiff wind as it moves in. Expect the forecasted path to firm up as we approach Wednesday. pic.twitter.com/3qgHXGfAVC

— KC O’Dea (@KC_ODEA) September 10, 2018

If the hurricane lasts for longer than four hours, contact a doctor immediately.

OBVIOUSLY, the guy who wrote this caption thought the EXACT. SAME. THING. I did. So I’m not alone in my perviness on this one.

And that’s not even the worst of it:

This is hard news to swallow. I don’t know if I can take it.

— Josh (@JoshsBurnerAcct) September 10, 2018

You can expect extremely wet conditions as the southernmost regions take a severe pounding…protection is strongly urged.

— Karen Robertson (@KRTXPatriot1836) September 11, 2018

The Carolinas are about to get screwed.

— The Sampo (@GoldSaltFlour) September 10, 2018

F’real.

Fortunately, this RAGING HARD, I mean HURRICANE is getting softer.

Hurricane #Florence Advisory 48A: Reconnaissance Aircraft Finds Florence Has Weakened Slightly. https://t.co/VqHn0uj6EM

— National Hurricane Center (@NHC_Atlantic) September 11, 2018

Oh, good.

But it’s still looking pretty darn bad…

Winds at the surface are much faster over water than land (friction)… and in a hurricane also stronger with height e.g. tall buildings or towers.

HWRF hurricane model still has Category 4 #Florence landfall late Thursday with sustained 130 mph winds. pic.twitter.com/bdyzwEASIr

— Ryan Maue | weathermodels.com (@RyanMaue) September 11, 2018

So STAY SAFE, everyone!

And with this one having just passed…. I swear, it's just one fuckin' thing after another… pic.twitter.com/iJIi5VNBfl

— Forgotten American Haywood Jablomeh (@JablomehHaywood) September 10, 2018

BAAAAHHAHAHAHA.