The Philly Eagles Parade Happened And Um… These Fans Are COMPLETELY INSANE

Eagles fans essentially TRASHED their own city after their big Super Bowl win this weekend, so many of us feared the worst for today’s parade.

On a related note: There was FREE BEER.

Free beer and some of the most insane fans in the country? WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?!

Well… So far it appears that the city remains relatively in tact.

Though the same cannot be said for some people’s dignity.

From the City of Brotherly Love, where’s there’s a lot of love to go around today, with aprox. 3 Million Eagles fans lining the streets for the parade, we’ve got Canadiens & Flyers w/me @djpoulin20 @GlennSchiiler @PierreVLeBrun at 7pm on TSN 2.

— John Bartlett (@BartsBytes) February 8, 2018

Holy SMOKES… that’s a lot of people… now consider the fact that most of them are proooobably drunk.

YEAH. THAT’S A HOLE CRAP TON OF DRUNK PEOPLE.

Pumped up Eagles fans sing #flyeaglesfly at the top of their lungs on a 4:30 am train ahead of the team’s victory parade today. pic.twitter.com/tS04Kg2vOJ

— World News Tonight (@ABCWorldNews) February 8, 2018

Ok… that’s fine.

But then things get WILD:

there’s a nude guy at the Eagles parade who has covered his body in cream cheese. “we covered the spread so now the spread’s covered me!”

— DL (@davelozo) February 8, 2018

Better be this cream cheese… pic.twitter.com/sFX8vj5ISV

— Hayden Grove (@H_Grove) February 8, 2018

OBVIOUSLY.

Is this a joke ? No one can tell.

This totally sounds like you’re just being funny and yet it’s completely believable

— Casual Mats (@Mats_44) February 8, 2018

Lots of “Big Dick Nick” chants here early at the #Eagles Super Bowl Parade.

— Brandon LII Gowton (@BrandonGowton) February 8, 2018

CLAAAASSY.

A family friendly affair!

pic.twitter.com/CLzQhAEWMI

— Eric Pollock (@epollock08) February 8, 2018

“Actual size” pic.twitter.com/2jg04jz7nO

— Busted College (@BustedCollege) February 8, 2018

Dicks out for the boys! @LacesOutShow pic.twitter.com/Bnvt0WY5Af

— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) February 8, 2018

Takes a lot to contain Big Dick Nick pic.twitter.com/CQA1IKgUA2

— Laces Out (@LacesOutShow) February 8, 2018

It turns out this is not a Super Bowl parade… this is simply a parade about the size of one man’s penis.

These classy ladies even got a mouth tattoo about it.

Suddenly eating the horse poop doesn’t seem all that bad pic.twitter.com/P09YlQPdeI

— Big Cat (@BarstoolBigCat) February 8, 2018

Beautiful.

But yeah… the whole thing was batsh*t.

🎶 We’re from Philly, f**king Philly
No one likes us, we don’t care 🎶

Jason Kelce sings with fans at #EaglesParade… pic.twitter.com/zrQBC2r0Us

— Matt Mullin (@matt_mullin) February 8, 2018

Mike Golic just claimed an Eagles fan broke his own fingers to get a doctors note and attend the parade. We have found Peak Philly. pic.twitter.com/zEibc10aBe

— Andrew Joseph (@AndyJ0seph) February 8, 2018

Philly Police radio: “Car 14, advise those players to get back on the bus. Make them understand if they do this in Center City we’re going to lose everything.” #Eagles players hop off #EaglesParade bus at Broad & Pattison.

— Chris Brennan (@ByChrisBrennan) February 8, 2018

People are running on top of porta potties at the Eagles parade pic.twitter.com/nIFOn36Oio

— Sports Illustrated (@SInow) February 8, 2018

Jason Kelce. Dressed as a Mummer, on a “stolen” police bicycle. One of a kind. #FlyEaglesFly #EaglesParade #Eagles #6ABCAction pic.twitter.com/uguI9FWkzf

— Jamie Apody (@JamieApody) February 8, 2018

So many people. So much weed #EaglesParade pic.twitter.com/a1zmyfkgVN

— Dan Levy (@DanLevyThinks) February 8, 2018

😂 #collinsworthless @Q102Philly best signs I have seen all day! #FlyEaglesFly #SuperBowlChampions #eagles pic.twitter.com/JN6knbQnWX

— Julz (@blacksmellycat) February 8, 2018

Tom Brady does, in fact, wear Uggs.

This had to be my favorite Tweet:

Oddly empty over at today’s snack bar pic.twitter.com/WfI0MwEswF

— Markham F Rollins IV (@mrollinsiv) February 8, 2018

Get it? Because of that one LUNATIC that ate horse crap…
Anyway.

It’s a jungle out there.

h/t Twitchy