Guess What Crystal Methvin Just Got Arrested For!
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June 2, 2018Some names are inescapable.
If your parents name you Jeeves, you’ll be a butler. No questions asked.
If your name is Crystal Methvin… weeeell………
The New York Post fills us in:
Talk about living up to your name.
A Florida woman named Crystal Methvin was arrested Saturday in St. Johns County on drug possession charges after being caught with crystal meth, jail records show.
She never really stood a chance, did she?
Methvin, 40, of St. Augustine, was busted after an anonymous caller tipped off cops who found her inside a car with two other people in a parking lot on South Dixie Highway, WJXT reports.
“Oh SHOOT. Do I know her?!” -Hannah Bleau, Chicks on the Right writer, St. Augustine resident.
Police searched the car and found drug paraphernalia and a substance that tested positive for crystal meth.
Of course it did.
It would have been TREASON if Crystal Methvin was using, say… Heroin.
Methvin was taken into custody with a man identified as Douglas Nickerson, WJXT reports.
Methvin has arrests in the county dating back to 1998 when she was booked into the St. Johns County Jail for driving under the influence. Most recently, she was arrested in January on 14 felony counts of drug possession and misdemeanor possession of drug equipment, jail records show.
Methvin remains in custody on $5,000 bond, according to jail records. It’s unclear if she’s hired an attorney.
I know the Meth epidemic is a fairly recent one, but meth was still around 40 years ago, right?
Like… her parents should have known better even then, correct?
Anyway, sorry Crystal. Some fates are inescapable.
(No they’re not. No one forced her to do meth… DESPITE the unfortunate name.)
