Bitter Lib Gets SCHOOLED After She Attempts To Mock Chick-Fil-A

In case you haven’t heard, some miserable soul wrote a giant piece for the New Yorker titled, “Chick-fil-A’s Creepy Infiltration of New York City.”

First of all, only a partisan weirdo with no taste buds would describe Chick-fil-A’s existence as “creepy.”

Chick-fil-A’s arrival in New York City feels like an infiltration, in no small part because of its pervasive Christian traditionalism. https://t.co/wnhMrMBN6z

— The New Yorker (@NewYorker) April 13, 2018

That naaaaaasty, creepy Christian company is TAKING OVER NYC and SERVING PEOPLE DELICIOUS CHICKEN and TELLING PEOPLE TO HAVE A BLESSED DAY! Can you believe that?

I noticed that word—community—scattered everywhere in the Fulton Street restaurant. A shelf of children’s books bears a plaque testifying to “our love for this local community.” The tables are made of reclaimed wood, which creates, according to a Chick-fil-A press release, “an inviting space to build community.” A blackboard with the header “Our Community” displays a chalk drawing of the city skyline. Outside, you can glimpse an earlier iteration of that skyline on the building’s façade, which, with two tall, imperious rectangles jutting out, “gives a subtle impression of the Twin Towers.”

This emphasis on community, especially in the misguided nod to 9/11, suggests an ulterior motive. The restaurant’s corporate purpose still begins with the words “to glorify God,” and that proselytism thrums below the surface of the Fulton Street restaurant, which has the ersatz homespun ambiance of a megachurch. David Farmer, Chick-fil-A’s vice-president of restaurant experience, told BuzzFeed that he strives for a “pit crew efficiency, but where you feel like you just got hugged in the process.” That contradiction, industrial but claustral, is at the heart of the new restaurant—and of Chick-fil-A’s entire brand. Nowhere is this clearer than in the Cows.

The nerve of Chick-Fil-A, honestly. Who do they think they are? Can you believe they want to glorify God by being nice, polite people? It’s sick. New York doesn’t need that. They need more fast food chains run by a$$wipes, please!

Defenders of Chick-fil-A point out that the company donates thousands of pounds of food to New York Common Pantry, and that its expansion creates jobs. The more fatalistic will add that hypocrisy is baked, or fried, into every consumer experience—that unbridled corporate power makes it impossible to bring your wallet in line with your morals. Still, there’s something especially distasteful about Chick-fil-A, which has sought to portray itself as better than other fast food: cleaner, gentler, and more ethical, with its poultry slightly healthier than the mystery meat of burgers. Its politics, its décor, and its commercial-evangelical messaging are inflected with this suburban piety. A representative of the Richards Group once told Adweek, “People root for the low-status character, and the Cows are low status. They’re the underdog.” That may have been true in 1995, when Chick-fil-A was a lowly mall brand struggling to find its footing against the burger juggernauts. Today, the Cows’ “guerrilla insurgency” is more of a carpet bombing. New Yorkers are under no obligation to repeat what they say. Enough, we can tell them. NO MOR.

This is what peak liberal looks like. Think of it as reaching the state of “clear” in Scientology. This is how you end up. You gain the ability to hate the unhateable. You’re able to b*tch and whine about companies that do their best to glorify God and treat all customers– regardless of gender, sexual orientation or political ideology– the same. You’re able to form sentences like “Its politics, its décor, and its commercial-evangelical messaging are inflected with this suburban piety” and expect everyone to take you seriously.

Thanks but no thanks. I’d rather not be miserable all the time. But hey– some liberals feel #inspired. Take, for instance, Jill.

One more thing I learned today: even its most die-hard fans don’t know how to spell “Chick-fil-A.” I guess Jesus can do a lot but he can’t make you good at branding.

— Jill Filipovic (@JillFilipovic) April 13, 2018

Also every Kenyan chicken and chips shop should open a branch in New York and give Chick-fil-A a run for its money. Mc Frys (which a friend here claims is pronounced “M.C. Frys,” not sure that’s correct but I like it) would make a killing.

— Jill Filipovic (@JillFilipovic) April 13, 2018

They’re DESPERATE for Chick-fil-A to fail. It’s incredibly amusing. And it’s even more hilarious when you realize that Jill’s little “Jesus/branding” jab is a mega FAIL. Remember this?

The fried chicken chain generates more revenue per restaurant than any other fast food chain in the US, according to a new QSR report.

Chick-fil-A’s average sales per restaurant in 2014 were $3.1 million, according to the report. Fried chicken competitor KFC sold $960,000 per restaurant.

The sub chain Jason’s Deli ranked a distant second with $2.7 million in per-restaurant sales, followed by Panera and McDonald’s, each with $2.5 million in per-restaurant sales.

Despite its relatively small size, Chick-fil-A also ranks highly in terms of its total systemwide sales.

The chain generated nearly $5.8 billion in revenue in 2014, making it the eighth largest fast food chain in the US, according to QSR.

BTW– Chick-fil-A is currently on track to become the third largest fast food chain in America.

According to restaurant consultancy firm Technomic, which shared its findings with Buzzfeed News, Chick-fil-A is poised to become the third-largest fast-food chain in the nation by 2020 in terms of sales, trailing behind only McDonald’s and Starbucks.

The chicken chain was ranked eighth in a 2017 report from QSR magazine, behind McDonald’s, Starbucks, Subway, Wendy’s, Burger King, Taco Bell and Dunkin’ Donuts.

“The trajectory we’re on would support that,” a Chick-fil-A spokesman told Buzzfeed News in response to Technomic’s findings.

According to the QSR 50 rankings, the average Chick-fil-A already takes in $4.4 million annually per unit, a figure that dwarfs its nearest competitor — Whataburger, which takes in $2.7 million per unit per year.

The average McDonald’s and Starbucks pull in $2.5 million and $1.1 million, respectively. Chick-fil-A, however, only boasts a fraction of the revenue-generating locations as McDonald’s and Starbucks.

Oops. Write that down, Jill.

Chick-fil-A is the fastest growing fast food chain in the country. They must be doing something right.

— … (@callmeMallas) April 14, 2018

What a sad life you have.

— JWF (@JammieWF) April 14, 2018

No worries, Jill. I'm sure the name is spelled correctly on their bank accounts. $$$$$$$$$$

— Elaine Batt (@elainebatt3) April 15, 2018

Exactly, that name has sure held them back.

— -dz- (@idletexan) April 13, 2018

I don't need to spell it to love a number 1.

— René Saldaña, Jr. (@ReneSaldanaJr) April 14, 2018

HA– real talk.

For someone who wrote a book about happiness, your tweets make you out to seem a bit bitchy. And very snowflakey.

— Camie Davis (@camie_davis) April 14, 2018

Agreed.

Branding—Definition: The marketing practice of creating a name, symbol or design that identifies and differentiates a product from other products.

Wow, it’s almost like they’ve done that…

I guess go Jesus…

— homework eater (@homeworkeater) April 15, 2018

Imagine be so encased in your viewpoint that you cannot just eat a piece of chicken without filtering it through your worldview to decide if its good or not. What a horrifying way to look at the world.

— Andrew Donaldson (@four4thefire) April 14, 2018

Lol, this tweet here tells more about your ignorance about branding and CFA than anything else

— HudsonRiverCroc (@HudsonRiverCroc) April 15, 2018

Now would be a good time to sit down, Jill. You’re just embarrassing yourself at this point.

PS– Bitterness causes wrinkles.